Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Little Hands, Big Jesus, & Signs

She said her heart was all warm and fuzzy now as I stare at her toothy grin from the rearview mirror.

“It’s my first good deed of the season,” She said in all her seven-year-old glory.

I glance at my red eyes for just a moment and see streaks of black mascara running down my face. As God begins to speak to my heart about my own calling assuring me that whatever He calls us to do, He is also calling my children to do, I begin to sob even harder.

I’ll go where You want me to go, Dear Lord.

I’ll stay when You want me to stay.

I’ll open my ears to hear their cries.

Help me to not be in such a hurry that I don’t stop in my tracks when Your Spirit is leading.

I’ve always had a heart for the homeless, you show me a broken person and my heart naturally gravitates towards them. Show me a broken girl, from a broken home, and I instantly long to mother her.

Today I was on a mission; time for a grocery trip that I was hoping could be quick with my five-year-old and seven-year-old. I was in “go mode” and I noticed their sign as they sat by the side of the road. I noticed their desperate faces and yet the light was green so I passed by with an ache in my heart.

Her little heart began to ache too and Whitley immediately began asking questions.

“Why the sign? Why don’t they have a home? Mom, don’t you think we can do something to help? Please turn around, Mom. Please.”

I turned around. How could I not? How could I ignore the tug on my heart for the second time? I dug in my wallet and pulled out some cash and then I gave it to her little, eager hands so willing to help. Her little hands could be the hands of Jesus reaching out to a world in need.

Her sweet hands held out the money as she smiled at the homeless man and said, "God bless you." Seeing her little hands brush up against his worn, calloused hands was the most beautiful sight.

I don’t know if I would have stopped if I hadn’t heard her little voice asking me to. I might have wondered if the little bit I had to give was enough. I might have just whispered a prayer and tried to ignore the tug on my heart.

There are so many people around us holding up invisible signs.

Do you see me?

Do you notice my pain?

Could you do something to help?

I will work for food.

I will do anything for love.

So many signs, do you see them?

When we have Jesus, we have everything to offer. Lord, help us to be Your hands and feet.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Hard to Swallow

When I was a little girl I had trouble swallowing pills. It was frustrating for my Mom and me. Mom knew I needed the medicine to get better. And as hard as I tried I just couldn't choke it down. After several tries and tears my Mom said, “Jennifer, I am going to pray and ask Jesus to help you swallow this medicine.”

Mom prayed and then I followed up the prayer with this, “...and Jesus could you please help my Mom to cut the pill in half.”

And that is exactly what my Mom did. She cut the pill in half making it so much easier to take down. Frustration and fear always cloud our problem solving.

I’m looking at the big picture and it seems so overwhelming, but what would happen if I cut it in half? Taking it scene by scene, the beginning, middle, and the end. So many things seem overwhelming and hard to swallow in life. It's easy to get frustrated and not know what to do. We approach so many different angles, wrestle with options, trying our best to make life fit.

Each dance starts with the first step as you build on the first by adding layers to each step until the final result is a routine that is seamless.

I have these dreams and goals for my life and I wanted to “arrive” last year. I want to accomplish these things, but I want to skip a few steps in my process of becoming. Knowing for a fact that the ones I admire so greatly had to pay a price for excellence, I have to throw away my expectations of just having something handed to me.

Right now I don’t know what my next step is supposed to look like, I just know I have to keep trying, to keep pressing on towards the prize and call of Heaven. I have to trust in the One who inspired the apostle to pen,

“…being confident of this very thing, that He who begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.” (Phil 1:6 NKJV)

At times my dance might look the “funky chicken.” At times it might look effortless and pristine with the fluid moments of a trained ballerina. And when I’m ticked off, which is pretty rare for me, it might look more like “krumping.” (Which for you white folk is hard-hitting, hip-hop street dance.)

So, if every step I take is ordered by the Lord. (Prov 37:23) I have to trust that even the most awkward, painful steps lead me one step closer to my God-dreams.

Let the dance begin!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Help for the Needy

For some reason I just can’t get away from the topic of neediness. So, instead of running from it or trying to cover it up like it doesn’t exist, I have decided to dig in the word of God and see what God might be trying to tell me in all of this.

So many of us have these seasons where we just feel so needy. We never hope to be that clingy girl, but with God…I’m thinking clingy might be a good thing. Because of the way that God loves us He has specific promises for the needy.

We seem so eager for God to fill us up and remove any traces of our neediness, but if we are honest, we know for a fact that we just travel back and forth from different states of neediness. It’s never ending. We were never meant to function apart from Him.

And yet, I’m the five-year-old saying, “I can do it myself.”

And after I have made myself cry from trying so hard, I come to Him with a tear-stained face asking for help with my clumsy hands.

What we can be sure of in our seasons of neediness is:

We have a God who will be our strength.

“For You have been a strength to the poor, a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm…” (Is 25:4)

He will lift you up!

“He raised the poor out of the dust, and lifts the needy out of the ash heap, that He may seat him with the princes-“ (Ps 113:7-8)

He will supply all your need.

“God shall supply all your need according to His riches and glory.” (Phil 4:8)

Lastly, He knows what you need.

“The Father knows the things you have need of before you ask.” (Matt 6:8)

He knows our needs before they even exist. He knows where we are and He longs to be all that we need. I’m thinking being needy isn’t such a bad thing after all.

Friday, October 8, 2010


I’m not really good at being needy.

I would rather not be.

I would like to have it all together and not need a thing.

But, I do.

God never seems to mind.

He simply beckons me to call,

Leading me gently into a place where I lack no good thing.

He opens His hands and satisfies every longing.

In the desert wasteland, He opens streams of living water where I can freely satisfy my thirsty soul.

He knows our needs before they even exist and He longs for us to look to Him first instead of exhausting all other resources before crying out to Him.

So, if you are anything like me…

Wanting to cover up your neediness, just know that you don’t have to.

My friend, in this place we are exactly where He wants us to be;

Completely dependant on Him.


We run to you. We acknowledge that we are needy before you and ask for more of your Spirit in our lives. Apart from You we are nothing. You long for us and woo us into your arms and hold us tight. Loving Father, you withhold no good thing from Your children so we rest in You.

We look to You.

We come before You needy people and we are so grateful that you don’t mind. Hover around us and take us deeper in You.

In You alone is everything we have need of.

In Jesus Name,